The Black Rose of Gunsmoke
by Haruka-chan1
Summary: Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it? I'm not yet sure what the coupling will be but at the moment V/M please R+R
1. Hello and Goodbye Chapter 1

The Black Rose of Gunsmoke  
  
By: Haruka-chan  
  
AN: Hello! *Yes I am embarrassed by my 'sweet' side more like retarded* Well anyway I am a new fan of Trigun, so I don't know ALL the information about it, but I'm on the quest of uncovering everything I can! AaAahah *See what I mean?* This Fic is going to different from most of the Vash returns with Knives and Meryl being bitch about it, and Wolfwood is alive *She had to do it for her cheery friend Milly* In this story everything is going to be quite the opposite. This fic is going to confusing, boring at times, and weird so read on your own discretion. I won't explain what it's about, I'll let you find out on your own ok let sing the Hamtaro song lalalalala *Excuse me while I go and slap my sweet (retarded) self*  
  
*....*- Means that it's character thoughts.   
  
*~....~*- Character is thinking about what someone said in the past.   
  
"...."- Means characters are talking.   
  
****.....****- Means dreams of the character.   
  
~~~***...***~~~- Means letters and notes from characters  
  
Hello and Good-bye...chapter 1  
  
Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it?  
  
Meryl sat at the saloon table and sighed. Wolfwood and Milly had been flirting with each other for the last 20 minutes, well more like Milly trying to understand 'Mr.Priest' with Wolfwood's 'flirting' words. "Hey Sempia what you think we should do for the rest of the night?" asked Milly. "I have some reports that I have to finish so why do you and Mr. Wolfwood go out" said Meryl. "Are sure you don't mind?" asked Milly. "I'm sure, and plush I'm sure Mr. Wolfwood would take you to a place where they have a lot of pudding" said Meryl knowing that would reduce any more objections. "Pudding?" Milly asked looking towards Wolfwood who smirked and nodded. Meryl chuckled at her partner's childish ways. *I wish I was as easy and free minded as her* thought Meryl looking at Milly laughing at something the bartender had said. "I'm going back to the hotel" said Meryl. Milly nodded and waved good-bye, and Wolfwood gave her a nod. Meryl found herself staring at the dark sky the moons and stars shining as if taunting her 'Meryl why don't you take a chance for once?' kind of way. "I'll always think before I act, that's my problem" she said to herself as she walked slowly towards the 3 star hotels, they have been staying in.   
  
Meryl pushed open the door and walked in to the somewhat nice but comfortable hotel room. She pushed herself towards the table holding her typewriter. She sat down and stared at the blank piece of paper. "I haven't wrote home for a while...I wonder how everyone is" she said out loud. It was funny how people seem to run from what they were most naturally destined to do, how they fight to become something more, or something they want to be. Meryl chuckled *I ran away from a life that suited me so well* she thought as she leaned back in her chair and stared at the ceiling. "Strange, I have never doubted myself before...before I met him" said Meryl. It was true she has changed ever since she was given the job to follow 60 billion dollar man, but she found that she wouldn't trade her life now for anything, she liked it even with it's hard ships. "It's a new day...hmmm...but all feel old...it's good..hmm..... life...that's what I'm told...hmm...but everyday it just all feels the same" said Meryl in between her humming. "Go to college a University...get a real job...hmm lalala...I don't ever wanna be you...this is the anthem throw all your hands up" said Meryl. Suddenly Meryl broke out in to laughter, she hasn't just laughed for the hell of it for a long time, but the soft knock of the door made her stop. "Come in" she said. The door opened to the tall blond. "Vash?!?" she asked as if she saw a ghost. Vash gave her one his cocky smile. "Hey insurance girl" he said. Meryl found herself smile, but quickly turned to one of her PMS-ing self. "What the hell took you so long?!?!" she yelled. Vash smiled yup this was 'his' Meryl.   
  
"Sorry I took so long, I didn't think you guys would still be here" he said. "What you mean we weren't going to be here?!?!" she asked. Vash smiled and sat down on her bed. "What was that thing you were singing?" asked Vash. "You heard me?" asked a flushed Meryl *He probably thinks I sound like a broken sand steamer* thought Meryl. "It was a song I use to listen to when I was a young girl" said Meryl. "Sounds interesting" he said. "So what happened?" asked Meryl. "With what?" asked Vash. "With Knives you needle noggin!" yelled Meryl. "Oh he's in the next room sleeping" said Vash. "Really?" asked Meryl. "Yeah, he was hurt during our battle" he said. "What about you?" asked Meryl. "I'm fine, I just need to rest for a while" he said with a smile. "Then go ahead and rest" she said. "I can't I have to watch over Knives, he's running a fever" said Vash. "You rest...I'll watch him" said Meryl. Vash looked shocked that she offered. "You don't have to" he said. "I know, but I want you to rest" she said softly and walked towards the door. "Take a shower first, you'll sleep better" she said walking to the next room. Vash heard her foot step then a pause, the opening of the door and then the closing of the door. "A shower..." he said as he walked towards the bathroom with a smile.   
  
Meryl had to pause for a second and think, she was planning on watching over a man that was responsible for so many deaths. *I have to do this for 'his' sake* she thought and walked in to find a replica of Vash only he had a lighter shade of blonde hair. "What you know they look so much alike" she said. The room was dimly lit. Meryl took of her boots and coat and sat in her white shirt and skirt bare foot on the small bench that was near the window. She looked over to knives and noticed that he was sweating probably due to his fever. Meryl then noticed the iced water on the nightstand next to the bed, she pulled up a chair next to the bed and took the washcloth from the cold water and slowly and gently she dabbed his face with it. It was amazing to her how soft his skin was. She shook her head and placed the cloth over his fore head. This was going to be one long night.   
  
Few hours later...  
  
Knives woke to find he was in a dim lit room, he was lying in bed, and his body ached and his head hurt but felt cool. He then noticed a woman, a human woman by the wind she was small but well curved, she had dark hair, she was looking at the sky, her bare legs tucked under her as she touched the glass with longing. "Who are you?" he asked. Meryl jumped up at the cold voice, she turned to find a pair of ice blue eyes staring at her. "I'm Meryl...umm...Vash needed to rest so I was looking at you..." she said quietly. Knives said nothing more and turned to look at the ceiling. He almost let out a gasp when he felt her cool hand on his cheek. "You still have a low fever, and it will be best if you went back to sleep" she said. Knives looked at her she didn't seem to be scared at all. Meryl stressed on striking a conversation. "Are you hunger? I'll go and get you something to eat and some medication" she said quietly. Knives said nothing he just watched her sit down on the couch and place her small feet in to the boots, and pick up her coat. She looked once more towards him "I won't be long" she said and slipped out. He continued to watch the door, as she promised she came back after about 15 minutes. "Sorry I took so long, I wanted to get you warm soup" she said as she placed the bowl of steaming liquid on the nightstand. "Can you sit up?" she asked. Knives didn't know why but he sat up for her. Meryl gave a small smile. Meryl looked down at his arms, and all the bandages around them. *It might reopen some of the wound if he moves so...* she thought picking up the blow. Knives watched as her eyes went to his arms, and then he watched her pick up the blow, and take a spoon full and blow on it gently to cool it. "Here open your mouth" she said.   
  
Knives watched her, as she held the spoon in front of him, he slowly opened his mouth, and felt the spoon enter and drop the warm liquid. "Is it good? I don't know what you like so..." said Meryl as she continued to feed him. Knives watched as she nervously blabbed on. When he finished with the soup she gave him a cup of cool water and medications, then wipe his lips clean. Knives sat and watched as she cleaned up and sat down once again. "Why are you doing all this?" he asked quietly. "Huh? Oh well I wanted Vash to rest so I'm here in his place" said Meryl. "Why would you do that for him?" asked Knives. "Because I care for him, and his health" said Meryl. Knives stared at her for a while longer then turned to face the ceiling. Meryl watched him nervously. *What if he gets all paranoid on me, and tries to kill me?* thought Meryl. Knives looked at the woman beside him who seems lost in nervous thoughts. *Why would they want to help him?* he thought. Meryl heard a soft knock at the door snapping her back to reality. She got up and opened the door to find Vash standing there with a smile. Meryl smiled back. "Thanks Meryl, maybe you should go rest now" said Vash walking in. "Don't worry he's woken and ate and took some medication" said Meryl. Vash nodded and smiled. "Thanks a lot" he said. Meryl nodded and looked at him. "Are you ok?" she asked. "I'm great!" said Vash. "You're a liar but ok" said Meryl taking her things and walking out the door. Knives watched his brother and that woman talk and saw the care they both held for each other.  
  
Vash looked at his brother. "So how are you feeling?" asked Vash. Knives looked at his brother then towards the door. "Why didn't you let me die?" he asked. "What kind of question is that, you're my brother!" said Vash. Knives said nothing. "Who was she?" asked Knives. Vash smiled. "She is a friend, doesn't she remind you of Rem?" he asked. Vash watched as his expression changed then went back to it's usual nothing. "She was afraid of you that's why I came" he said. "She held no fear just thoughts" said Knives. "Maybe so, but those thoughts would have led to fear" said Vash. Knives looked at Vash. "You trust her kind?" he asked. "Yes, I trust her, and her kind" said Vash. "Your a fool!" said Knives. "Maybe so, but I gained many friends while being a fool" said Vash taking a seat by the window. Knives gave Vash his back and closed his eyes. Vash frowned *I just hope you see it too* he thought. Meryl woke to find it was early in the morning. She looked out the small window of the hotel room. She inhaled the scent from her pillow, which smelled like Vash. "I wonder what more this cruel life holds for him" she said as she got up and got dressed. Today she felt like wearing something other then her suite. People turned to say their hello to Meryl as she stepped out of the hotel and in to the street. They have been living in the town for a while and people knew them well. Meryl stepped in to the small bakery and smiled. "I'll have a dozen doughnuts please" she said. The lady nodded and smiled.  
  
Meryl stopped by both Wolfwood's and Milly's room and saw that they were both still asleep. "I guess they were out late" said Meryl as she stopped in front of the room that Vash and his brother were in. *Maybe I should just leave them alone* she thought. "No, I'm sure he's hungry so..." said Meryl to herself and walked in. She found Knives sleeping, and Vash slumped by the window sleeping. Meryl walked towards Vash and moved some of his hair that was falling in his face. Vash opened one eye and found Meryl moving his hair, he didn't know why but he reached out and pulled her towards him. Meryl let out a small yelp but then calmed down when she saw or thought that Vash was asleep. Meryl smiled softly and combed his hair with her fingers. This was the first time she showed any romantic affection towards him, but maybe it was a motherly or sisterly affection to him. Vash smiled in to her stomach, he then noticed that what ever she was wearing was light and soft and smelled different but good. Knives turned to face his brother to find that he was holding the woman from last night, and she smiled and started to run her fingers through his hair. She was comforting him, the bond he shared with his brother, let him feel what he felt, even if it bothered him most of the time. "I bought doughnuts just in case you were hungry" said Meryl softly knowing that he was awake when he moved his head a little. Vash's head popped up and he had one of his cocky grins. "Doughnuts?" he asked.   
  
Meryl laughed and nodded as she handed him the box she had placed on the table. Vash let her go and grabbed the bag opening it up and popping the sweets in to his mouth. "These are fresh!" he said. Meryl took a seat next to him and nodded. "I know Mrs. Kieko just baked them" said Meryl. Vash offered Meryl some but she shook no. "You should save some for your brother" said Meryl looking towards a 'sleeping' Knives. Vash stopped and looked towards her and smiled. "I don't think I thanked you enough" said Vash. "Don't worry about it, it's not like I'm doing much now anyway" said Meryl. "Why didn't you go back to Bernadelli's?" he asked. "Because I like it here, and Wolfwood and Milly seem to like it here as well" said Meryl trying to cover the real reason that she was there. Vash knew very well she was waiting for him, but just smiled. Knives watched as his brother smiled and tucked some hair from the woman's face behind her ear. Meryl blushed but quickly recovered. "Well, I better go and do something..." said Meryl quietly. "Why don't you stay here...we'll talk" said Vash. Meryl gave a low chuckle. "About what Vash? Everything is still the same..." she whispered. "Everything?" he asked looking down at the floor. "Everything" she confirmed. Meryl and walked towards the door. "Your wrong everything has changed" he said. Meryl stopped for a second. "Did they really?" she asked and walked out.  
  
Knives felt a pain rush over him, or more to be Vash's pain. He watched as his brother sat and watched the door that she had left through. Was she really worth that much to him, that she caused him pain? Was it possible that his brother was in love with this woman? Or it was that she reminded him of 'Her' that he cared so much? So many strange and unwanted questions clouded Knives head. "I see you're awake" said Vash. Knives said nothing just stared at the ceiling. "Your wounds will close soon" said Vash. "Why waste your time on her, she will die and you will continue to live on" said Knives. Vash frowned. "She's my friend I care for her, and yes I will feel great sorrow when she is gone, but for now I can have her here with me" said Vash more to himself then Knives. "Does she really care for you? Was it not her that was following you around, and had consent to kill you?" asked Knives. "I'm glad she followed me, and that she waited for me...without her and the others I would be dead right now" he said. Knives snorted. "You will die, if not by me then by them. They will always accuse you first, they might seem like your friend one-second but if there is any chance that it could be you they will turn on you" said Knives. Vash had to agree with what he had said, but he also had to believe no matter what happened Meryl, Milly and Wolfwood would always be there for him.  
  
"Maybe so, but not all. She will never go against me, and she already proved that to me" said Vash. Knives said nothing more. "If you can sit up, then eat these doughnuts she got for us, I already ate some" said Vash placing the box next to the night stand. "I'll be back in a while" said Vash walking out the door. Knives looked from the door to the window. Confined and trapped. He got up slowly and walked over to the window. The memory of Meryl sitting here and looking up at the sky with longing kept flashing in his head. She was truly sad, and held great pain with in her. He sat down on the couch by the window, and let out a long sigh. He was stuck this way, with humans, but then again Meryl did show him some generosity, she wouldn't be all bad. Right?. Vash leaned against the door and sighed. *Why do you keep running?* he thought. He walked towards Milly's room, just as he was about to open it he heard Meryl talk. "Milly you'll have to help Vash out now, I have been reassigned" she said.  
  
TBC  
  
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AN: Ok tell me what you think. I'll have chapter 2 up real soon, and you tell me if it should be a Meryl/Vash or Knives/Meryl. Sorry for grammar and spelling, I can't spell for shit! and my word doc isn't helpful either. Anyway please REVIEW!!!! Thanks ^_~ 


	2. Two worlds Chapter 2

The Black Rose of Gunsmoke  
By: Haruka-chan  
  
AN: Hello! *Yes I am embarrassed by my 'sweet' side more like retarded* Well anyway I am a new fan of Trigun, so I don't know ALL the information about it, but I'm on the quest of uncovering everything I can! AaAahah *See what I mean?* This Fic is going to different from most of the Vash returns with Knives and Meryl being bitch about it, and Wolfwood is alive *She had to do it for her cheery friend Milly* In this story everything is going to be quite the opposite. This fic is going to be confusing, boring at times, and weird so read on your own discretion. I won't explain what it's about, I'll let you find out on your own. Ok let sing the Hamtaro song lalalalala *Excuse me while I go and slap my sweet Cough(retarded)Cough self*  
  
*....*- Means that it's character thoughts.   
*~....~*- Character is thinking about what someone said in the past.   
"...."- Means characters are talking.   
****.....****- Means dreams of the character.   
~~~***...***~~~- Means letters and notes from characters  
  
Two worlds...Chapter 2  
  
Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it?  
  
Last Time...  
***************************************************************  
"Maybe so, but not all. She will never go against me, and she already proved that to me" said Vash. Knives said nothing more. "If you can sit up, then eat these doughnuts she got for us, I already ate some" said Vash placing the box next to the nightstand. "I'll be back in a while" said Vash walking out the door. Knives looked from the door to the window. Confined and trapped. He got up slowly and walked over to the window. The memory of Meryl sitting here and looking up at the sky with longing kept flashing in his head. She was truly sad, and held great pain with in her. He sat down on the couch by the window, and let out a long sigh. He was stuck this way, with humans, but then again Meryl did show him some generosity, she wouldn't be all bad. Right? Vash leaned against the door and sighed. *Why do you keep running?* he thought. He walked towards Milly's room, just as he was about to open it he heard Meryl talk. "Milly you'll have to help Vash out now, I have been reassigned" she said.  
*****************************************************************  
"Mr. Vash is back?!?" asked Milly. "Yeah he came back yesterday but I guess you guys were still out" said Meryl. "Sempia?" asked Meryl. "I just got Mr. Hankinson's letter he wants me to go back to HQ he said that I am no...no longer needed here" choked out Meryl. "Did he say why?" asked Milly. Meryl shook her head. "He said that he wants to see me and that it's urgent, but you are now solo in following Vash around" said Meryl. "Well, I'm going with you!" said Milly. Meryl looked at the hyperactive Milly sitting on her head in her Pjs' "Milly, I need you to take care of things for me" said Meryl. "Take care of what? We already know that Mr. Vash isn't dangerous, and Mr. Priest well there is nothing wrong with him, so what do I need to take care of?" asked Milly. "Them, they might not be dangerous, but they do need someone to keep them out of trouble" said Meryl. "That's true, but I'm sure they will be happy to be own their own" said Milly. Meryl sighed. "Milly what about your job?" asked Meryl. "I'll just say that I'm your partner and don't want anyone else" said Milly. "There is no way to convince you is there?" she asked. "Nope!" said Milly. Meryl chuckled "Milly as much as I would like to have you by my side, I don't want you to lose your job" she said. "I wonder how everyone is back at HQ, I wonder what's going to be our next mission" asked Milly. Meryl's eyes contrasted to dots with few strand of hair sprung out. "Do you think Mr. Yamazi still has a thing for you?" asked Milly throwing all her things in to the suite case. "Milly will you listen to me!" yelled Meryl. Milly stopped and looked at her partner/friend. "Milly if not your damn job at least think about Wolfwood! You have to be here for the one you love don't you?" asked Meryl. Milly's expression changed.  
  
Vash leaned against the wall that was next to Milly's room. He let out a small painful chuckle. *I' finally free, I came back and she has to leave* thought Vash. "What's with the long face?" asked Wolfwood walking out of his own room. "Huh? Oh nothing" said Vash. Wolfwood chuckled. "The small girl giving you grief?" He asked. Vash grinned "No, its just life" he said. Wolfwood nodded just as Meryl walked out. "Good morning" she said. Wolfwood looked at a Meryl in a lavender shirt and black skirt. "What happened to your clothing?" asked Wolfwood. Veins popped up in Meryl's head "I decided to change them" she said through clenched teeth. "They look good on you" he said. Meryl smiled her thanks but her gaze fell towards the ground. "I have something to tell you both" said Meryl. "What?" asked Wolfwood. "Sempia is leaving" said Milly with teary eyes. Everyone's eyes turned to dots with sweat drops. "What Milly means is that I will be going to back to HQ...so you guys are on your own" said Meryl. "What's with the sudden change?" asked Wolfwood. "My boss reassigned me..." said Meryl. Wolfwood's eyes went straight to Vash who didn't say anything. "What about the big girl?" he asked. "Milly will be staying with you guys and taking care of everything" said Meryl. "So your just going to leave?" asked Vash finally talking. Meryl didn't look at him, the truth was she couldn't look at him. Wolfwood noticed the tension, and eyed Milly who nodded and the two slipped away. "I don't have a choice" said Meryl. "When will you be back" he asked. "I...I don't know" she whispered. "So this is it, this is good-bye?" asked Vash. "I don't want it to be" she said. "then why are you letting it?" he asked. Meryl let out a small gasp. "I can't do anything about it" she said.  
  
Vash turned and faced her before walking towards her and pulling her in to her room. Meryl was confused until he closed the door and pulled her in to a tight embrace. "Don't go..." he whispered. "I have to..." she said. "I'm not asking Meryl the Insurance girl, but Meryl Stryfe my friend..." said Vash. *And so much more* he thought. Meryl gasped and held him tighter as tears rushed out. "I am the same person Vash, I am the same person, who has no choice" she said. They pulled apart slightly, as Vash used one hand to caress her face. Meryl leaned in to his hand, as she felt him draw her near. Meryl looked up at him and saw the tears that were shining in his eyes. "Don't leave me Meryl..." he said before closing the gap between them. Meryl felt his soft lips against hers, it was one of her longings and now here he was standing here kissing her. Maybe this was all a weird dream and when she wakes up everything will be as it was. She returned the kiss and parted her lips beneath his. She felt the strong arms, which surrounded her, tighten as he slipped his tongue into her mouth and gently slid it against her own. She raised her arms and wrapped them around his neck, pulling him even closer. Vash groaned and slowly released her willing lips. As he step back a little he noticed that both of them were out of breath and Meryl's lips were swollen and her face flushed, and stained with tears. "Why?" she asked stupidly. "I need you Meryl..." she said. "No why did you kiss me?" she asked again. "I have wanted to do that for so long now" he said as he held her.   
  
"I love you..." she whispered as she tighten her grip on him. "Then why are you running away?" he asked. "I'm not running" said Meryl. Vash shook his head. "You are running away...and leaving those who need you" he said. Meryl pulled away and looked at him. "You don't need me, Milly has Wolfwood, and you have Knives" said Meryl. "Is that going to make it up?" he asked. "I don't know" she said. "How could you be in love with me then?" he asked. Meryl gasped "How could you say that?" she asked. "You love your job, it's more important to you isn't it" he said. "Does it matter if I love you or not?!? You will never love me not the way you love 'her'..." said Meryl. Vash's eyes widen, but then it went back to it's normal size. "Maybe your right...maybe I am in love with my job, and not you" she said. "Meryl..." started Vash. "No, Vash...no I think your right...now please just leave" she said turning away as more tears rushed out of her. Vash wanted to reach out and hold her, but he just couldn't do it as he walked out. Meryl dropped to her knees when she heard the door shut. Her heart was just ripped to pieces, he didn't even prove her wrong that he loved Rem Saverem in a way he wouldn't ever love her. And what he said hurt like getting shot over and over in the chest. But what hurt more was that it was true, all up until he said that she didn't really love him.   
  
Once again Knives felt a rush of pain hit him, only this one was much more stronger then the others he ever felt, this compared to 'that' time. He heard the door open, and it close. Vash walked in and leaned against the door, he stood that way for a while before dropping to his knees as tears glistened in his eyes. He held his head in one hand and shook it. "You look pathetic" said Knives. "Just shut up" said Vash. "Why do you torture yourself? I told you getting involved with 'those kind' will always bring you pain" said Knives. Vash didn't say anything. "I am such an idiot" said Vash. "Took you long enough" said Knives. "I won't let her get away" said Vash. Knives just looked towards his brother where he stood and wiped his eyes in a childish way and walked out of the room. "What an idiot" said Knives. "If he just hated all of them, he wouldn't feel so much pain" said Knives. "What is so special about her anyway?" he asked. "She is nothing but a spider, who is trying to slowly kill the butterfly" said Knives. He walked over to the bed and lied down, and looked up at the ceiling. *Vash, I will teach you to forget your pain, and show you the true face of these humans* he thought as sleep slowly over took his tired and wounded body.  
  
Meryl spent most of the day packing, and booking her ticket for the sand steamer and all the other 'important' things she had to do. She finished packing her type writer the last thing she had to do. Meryl stood and stared at the wall that separated them. She felt the liquid that started to fall down her face slowly. "I was such a bitch" she said. "How could I say that to him?" she asked as she headed for the door. "I have to go" she said to herself once more then to anyone who was listening. She walked out in to the hall and stared at the door for a minute, before opening and walking in to find the room empty other then a sleeping Knives. Meryl knew he wasn't there but called his name anyway. "Vash..." she asked. "He left, he said he didn't want to see you" said Knives. "What?" asked Meryl. "He said that you really pissed him off, and that he didn't want to see you" said Knives. Meryl's eyes water instantly. *He didn't want to see me?* she thought. "Why should I believe that?" she asked. "I'm not telling you to believe it, you were looking for him and I told you" said Knives. Meryl walked over to the window and looked out. "I mest up, I mest everything up" she whispered. "Why cry? It's not like your kind has any feelings" said Knives. "Shut up! what would you know about feelings, if the only damn thing you let yourself feel is hate?!?" asked Meryl. Knives wanted to gasp but held back and send her a cold glare. "You blame all your damn problem on us, but what about you!?" she asked. "If it wasn't for you, we might be in a beautiful planet, we might still have people we cared about, still alive!" said Meryl. Knives said nothing as he watched the tears flow down her face, he would have laughed at her, for her stupid weak emotion, but something held him back.  
  
"Don't tell me what to feel, first you should learn how the human heart works before you blame others" she whispered. "If you care about him so much, then why would you chose your job over him?" asked Knives. "Because I love him, and I don't want him to feel that he has to choose, I know that he can't ever love like he loved her...but I let myself fall in love in hope that maybe he could love me...someday" said Meryl as she dropped to her knees with uncontrollable tears. "And now I mest everything up, I let him walk away. I said selfish things, and pushed him away" said Meryl as she cried. Knives watched "Your an idiot race" he said. Meryl couldn't care less what a psycho had to say about her race, but this human loves his brother unconditionally. Vash stood in the hall in front of Meryl's, room before opening it and found her packed bags and an empty room. *Where did she go?* he thought as he walked in to his room, to find a crying Meryl and a Knives that could careless. "Meryl..." he whispered. Meryl looked up to see him standing by the door. "Vash" she said as she launched herself at him. "I'm sorry" they both said in unison. "I was being selfish, I'm sorry that I brought someone as important as her up in this stupid argument" she said. Vash held her and nodded. "I was being selfish too" he said. "Yea, but you have a right to be, your always giving back to us, now it was time that you get what you want" said Meryl. "Your still leaving" he said. "Yeah, I am sorry" she said holding him tight. "Will you wait for me Vash the stamped?" she asked looking at his eyes. Vash nodded and bent down to kiss her.   
  
Knives watched as his brother and the woman kiss. Something in him flared with an unknown emotion or it was known, he just pushed it all inside of him like she had said. His brother always had a thing away with the woman, a kind of charm that he never mastered. He watched as his brother held the second woman he loved probably for the last time as she slipped away from him. Knives felt waves of all these emotions that he had locked up since the project SEEDs. Now if he thought back to it, it was two different humans that influenced his brother and him. Rem influenced Vash, while Steve influenced him. Knives chuckled as it all came back to him. He knew everything about himself, but he tried to convince himself that everything was fine, that he must hate others instead of himself. Just like his belief of to save one you must kill the other. It has worked for him all up until now. "This is good-bye huh?" asked Vash with a small smile. "Vash promise me something" said Meryl. "Huh what?" he asked. "That if you feel sad, then you'll feel sad, but only for the time you need to, but don't lock it all away in you...it doesn't help" she said. Vash nodded. "And I take back what I said...if you fall in love with some else while I am gone, then love that person, don't wait for me" she said. "But-" Vash was stopped by Meryl's lips. When she pulled away she smiled. "I will always have a space for you in my heart, and I will always love you Vash the Stamped" she said and held him for the while more she had, because it was time for her to wake up from this dream she has been living in.  
  
TBC or Not TBC that is the question...[AN: Corny, no?]  
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AN: I could just finish the story here, but I won't if you guys review and tell me not too....  
Anyways it's the usual sorry about spelling, and grammar, my key board is old and sometimes misses letters. I am so happy that you guys reviewed made me very happy. ^_^ anyways tell me what you think of this chapter, I will continue with the story, but if I get a lot of reviews I will really make it good. 


	3. twist and turns Chapter 3

The Black Rose of Gunsmoke  
By: Haruka-chan  
  
AN: Hello! *Yes I am embarrassed by my 'sweet' side more like retarded* Well anyway I am a new fan of Trigun, so I don't know ALL the information about it, but I'm on the quest of uncovering everything I can! AaAahah *See what I mean?* This Fic is going to different from most of the Vash returns with Knives and Meryl being bitch about it, and Wolfwood is alive *She had to do it for her cheery friend Milly* In this story everything is going to be quite the opposite. This fic is going to be confusing, boring at times, and weird so read on your own discretion. I won't explain what it's about, I'll let you find out on your own. Ok let sing the Hamtaro song lalalalala *Excuse me while I go and slap my sweet Cough(retarded)Cough self*  
  
*....*- Means that it's character thoughts.   
*~....~*- Character is thinking about what someone said in the past.   
"...."- Means characters are talking.   
****.....****- Means dreams of the character.   
~~~***...***~~~- Means letters and notes from characters  
  
twist and turns...Chapter 3  
  
Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it?  
  
Last Time...  
**************************************************************************************  
Knives watched as his brother and the woman kiss. Something in him flared with an unknown emotion or it was known, he just pushed it all inside of him like she had said. His brother always had a thing away with the woman, a kind of charm that he never mastered. He watched as his brother held the second woman he loved probably for the last time as she slipped away from him. Knives felt waves of all these emotions that he had locked up since the project SEEDs. Now if he thought back to it, it was two different humans that influenced his brother and him. Rem influenced Vash, while Steve influenced him. Knives chuckled as it all came back to him. He knew everything about himself, but he tried to convince himself that everything was fine, that he must hate others instead of himself. Just like his belief of to save one you must kill the other. It has worked for him all up until now. "This is good-bye huh?" asked Vash with a small smile. "Vash promise me something" said Meryl. "Huh what?" he asked. "That if you feel sad, then you'll feel sad, but only for the time you need to, but don't lock it all away in you...it doesn't help" she said. Vash nodded. "And I take back what I said...if you fall in love with some else while I am gone, then love that person, don't wait for me" she said. "But-" Vash was stopped by Meryl's lips. When she pulled away she smiled. "I will always have a space for you in my heart, and I will always love you Vash the Stamped" she said and held him for the while more she had, because it was time for her to wake up from this dream she has been living in.  
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2 years later...[AN: Damn times flies]  
  
*Baby crying* "Damn, where is his mute button?" asked Wolfwood picking up the baby boy and turning it around as if searching for a switch. "Here give him to me" said Milly as she took the baby and gently started to rock him. The noise died down slowly and soon it was the soothing sound of Milly's humming. Wolfwood flopped down on the couch and sighed. "I don't know how you do it" said Wolfwood. Milly smiled. "Hey everyone, I bought doughnuts, well what's left of it anyways" said Vash holding up an open box with two doughnuts in it. "How thoughtful of you to save us some Tongari" said Wolfwood. Vash grinned. Milly laughed. "Come on sit down Mr. Vash" she said. Vash looked towards where Milly was holding the baby and a painful image of Meryl standing there with a baby came in to his mind. "Milly what happened? Why did you call me over" asked Vash. "Well, Mr. Vash I just got a this letter from Sempia and I though-" Milly didn't get to finish due to Vash's sudden grab of the letter in Milly's hand. *After two damn years!* he thought as he looked down at the unopened white envelope. "Sweetie do you think you can help me with the kids?" asked Milly. Wolfwood nodded and headed towards Milly's direction leaving Vash alone in the room. Vash slowly opened the letter. As many question, and wonders where going threw this head.  
  
~~~***Meryl's Letter***~~~  
  
Dear Milly,  
  
How have you been, I am happy for you and Wolfwood. When do you think I will be an auntie? I finally had a chance to sit down and write to you. In your last letter you mentioned that Wolfwood, Vash, and you moved to Wolfwood's hometown of September and that you two were going to help take care of the orphan kids. That you two were getting married...I wish I was there to share that wonderful day with you. If only I could tell you how many times I wanted to leave it all and run to you guys. I feel so lonely here, everyone is so wind up. Milly I miss you so much. I am a fool...I let myself think I could live without him. That I could put everything just so he could be happy. I didn't want to rush him. I didn't him to choose me and the person he had loved for so long and lived for. I am so selfish Milly, the way it all ended was just too much, but now my heart is dead. Milly the chief...he asked me to...marry him. He called me back with that intention the whole time. Milly I want to refuse but I don't know what more there is for me. I'm sure Vash has moved on...he must have found someone beautiful. Don't I sound pathetic? I am thinking about quitting the job at Bernardelli. The chief has been pressing me about the answer, and I can't tell him that I am in love with 'Vash the stamped' oh Milly I wish you were here to help me escape this, everything is falling apart for me...it fell a part when I had to leave Vash. I don't have anything to live for anymore. Maybe Knives was right about how I was a fool...  
  
Everything is so much complicated now, I never thought that I would fall in love with the man that I was to look after. I wasn't supposed to fall in love with him. I shouldn't have this is causing problems for everyone. I'm hurting so many people...I'm a terrible friend and a worse woman. All I cared about is my job, I was being an idiot. I want to see him Milly. Every night I lay awake seeing his face on the dark wall of my room, and all I could think of is how much I miss him as tears sting my eyes. I never thought of love Milly, I was never that little girl thinking about my knight in shinning armor. But after traveling with Vash I started to care for him so much that now when I think about the good times we shared my heart wants to rip apart. Two damn years has passed and yet I still feel like my heart that is like a wound that never closes and I am bleeding to death everyday over and over again. Milly I want to hold him, my arms are so empty. Holding another man isn't like holding him. I must be boring you with all these stupid blabbing. I am sure you guys all moved on. I hope to hear that you and Wolfwood are going to have a baby soon, and that Vash has someone who he is happy with. I want all of you to be happy, and that will be good enough for me. I know this was short but I promise I will write a long letter when I hear from you. I really do miss all of you...  
  
Love,  
Meryl  
P.S. Don't forget to send me pictures!  
  
~~~***End Of Meryl's Letter***~~~[AN: That letter was so stupid]  
  
Vash had tears in his eyes. How could she possibly think that he moved on? These past two years were like living the 133 years of his life all over again. At night all he could think about was what it feel to hold her, to have her body next to his, to taste her lips again. She has been haunting him since she left. Now she thinks that he has moved on? How could she? How? Damn why does life have to be such a bitch to him? Vash held the letter in his hand as more tears flooded his face. *~I wish you were here to help me escape this~* Her words were like a dagger being stabbed in to his heart every minute he sat there. "Damn her* said Vash. Milly looked from the door as her expression changed to a sadden one. Wolfwood saw the look on his wife's face and shook his head. "DAMN IT" yelled Vash before getting up and walking out of the house. Milly walked up and picked up the letter and started to read it. "Oh Sempia" she whispered looking towards the door that Vash had disappeared through. *Dear lord I pray that you bring them together* she thought holding her now swollen belly.  
  
Vash found himself walking around the empty desert as if trying to walk away from it all. but every where he looked her face would be there smiling at him taunting him to reach out and only find the golden sand. *I can't live without her* he thought letting his legs fall, as he fell to his knees and soon he was sitting on the hot sand with tears trailing down his face. How could he forget the only other woman he ever loved other then Rem Saverem? Why do they keep leaving him behind? Was he that hard to love? It was ironic that both woman were so drawn to their job. Rem gave her life for the duty she felt towards saving human race, while Meryl was no different. If the situation wasn't so depressing he would have laughed at his taste in women. She mentioned that Knives was right about her being a fool, but the real fool was he, he let her slip through his fingers, he didn't follow like she had done. He didn't stick to her like she would have done. "I let her go once, but this time she isn't getting away" he said as he stood. "This time I won't let another woman die out of duty" he said and started to walk towards a future that he was going to finally make, and not life decide for him.  
  
Back at December city...[AN: I don't know where Bernardelli Insurance company is, but in this story it's going to be in December city]  
  
Another day that seems like a year for Meryl as she climbed the steps to her lifeline. Funny this was her lifeline yet she was barely alive anymore. She pushed through the glass door of the building to be greeted by the fake people that surrounded her. She walked in to her fairly large office and set down her brief case. "Morning Meryl" said a tall blonde walking in. "Hey Claire" she said quietly. "Meryl what's happening to you, lately you have been out of it. Your have been different since you came back from your trip, but lately you have been completely 'dead' what's wrong?" she asked. "I guess to much work" said Meryl with a weak smile. "I know that can't be it, your the job Meryl there is no way you can be stress out from work" said Claire. Meryl sighed and chuckled. "I gave up everything for this stupid job" she said spitefully. Claris looked troubled by her friend's strange behavior, everyone but Meryl Stryfe says this was a stupid job. "But one thing that this job did give me was three years that I cherish" she said. "Are you upset about Milly's absence?" asked Claire. "I guess I am" said Meryl. "Well, I have to say that I feel bad that the poor girl has to look after such a dangerous man" said Claire. Meryl slammed her hand on her desk making her blonde friend jump. "He isn't dangerous at all! He isn't what they say instead he is the most sweeties guy I have ever met, he loves life, he wouldn't harm a small bug even if it bit him half to death" said Meryl as her eyes went glassy.  
  
"He's nothing they say he is..." she whispered. "Meryl what has gotten in to you..." asked Claire. "Meryl" said a deep voice. "Oh morning chief" said Claire facing the tall handsome man with brown hair and deep green eyes. [AN: I know in the anime the chief looks nothing close to being cute, but I feel for Meryl so I will make him handsome, but not as much as Vash] "Morning Parker" said the chief. Meryl looked out the window. Claire nodded and left closing the door behind her. "Meryl?" he asked again, but she didn't move. "Are you feeling all right?" asked the chief placing his hand on her shoulder. "Please, tell me what's bothering you" he said softly. "I can't..." she said. "Why not? Because I can't. You have to give me room to breath Jonathan" she whispered. "Why do I get the feeling that you're not happy?" he asked. *Because I'm not you idiot!* thought Meryl. "I'm fine just a little stressed out" she said. "Meryl...I will 'wait' as long as you need" he said. Meryl thought her tears would explode right there and then when those words came from his lips. "Jonathan I'm fine...and I don't want to make you wait forever" she said. He chuckled and wrapped his arms around her shoulder and placed a kiss on her cheek. Meryl was glad that the window didn't show her reflection, because that would have given away all the pain that was evident there. "I don't care, I will if I have to" he said. Meryl nodded. "I think we should go back to work" she said as she pushed away from him. "Meryl do you mind explaining to me why you keep pushing me away?" he asked. "Jonathan please just don't push me, you know I'm not comfortable..." she said. "Not comfortable enough to kiss me?" he asked. "I'm sorry!" yelled Meryl. Jonathan's features softened. "Meryl I want to be there for you" he said placing a hand on her cheek.  
  
Meryl turned away from his hand. "Then be there and don't push yourself on me" said Meryl. "I don't want to be selfish Jonathan but I can't have you in my space...I'm not ready to share that space with 'you' yet" she said looking down at the ground. *The truth is there is only one person I can share my life with, but he's not here...no I'm not going to cry* she thought. "Meryl" he said. "Jonathan it's best if we just leave it at that I really need some time to finish the latest report" said Meryl. Jonathan sighed and walked towards the door. "Well, have lunch then" he said walking out. Meryl let her tears out when she heard the door close. "I can't live without him" she whispered. "I can't live this false life" she whispered. Vash stood outside the large building. *I'm here* he thought.  
  
TBC  
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AN: Wow I love you guys who reviewed!! I am so happy. Anyways because of all of your review I decided to write this on a Tuesday night, putting of my studies for a while. I know it is short but I was so happy that I wanted to give you guys another chapter. Anyways I had no intentions of ending this story in the last chapter. This is going to be a long story, or at least I am planning to make it a long one. The next chapter will be up on Friday night or Saturday morning. sorry about spelling and grammar. Thanks to all reviewers!! ^_^ 


	4. The unbearable feelings Chapter 4

The Black Rose of Gunsmoke  
By: Haruka-chan  
  
AN: Hello! *Yes I am embarrassed by my 'sweet' side more like retarded* Well anyway I am a new fan of Trigun, so I don't know ALL the information about it, but I'm on the quest of uncovering everything I can! AaAahah *See what I mean?* This Fic is going to different from most of the Vash returns with Knives and Meryl being bitch about it, and Wolfwood is alive *She had to do it for her cheery friend Milly* In this story everything is going to be quite the opposite. This fic is going to be confusing, boring at times, and weird so read on your own discretion. I won't explain what it's about, I'll let you find out on your own. Ok let sing the Hamtaro song lalalalala *Excuse me while I go and slap my sweet Cough(retarded)Cough self*  
  
*....*- Means that it's character thoughts.   
*~....~*- Character is thinking about what someone said in the past.   
"...."- Means characters are talking.   
****.....****- Means dreams of the character.   
~~~***...***~~~- Means letters and notes from characters  
  
The unbearable feelings...Chapter 4  
  
Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it?  
  
Last Time...  
*****************************************************************************************************  
"He's nothing they say he is..." she whispered. "Meryl what has gotten in to you..." asked Claire. "Meryl" said a deep voice. "Oh morning chief" said Claire facing the tall handsome man with brown hair and deep green eyes. [AN: I know in the anime the chief looks nothing close to being cute, but I feel for Meryl so I will make him handsome, but not as much as Vash] "Morning Parker" said the chief. Meryl looked out the window. Claire nodded and left closing the door behind her. "Meryl?" he asked again, but she didn't move. "Are you feeling all right?" asked the chief placing his hand on her shoulder. "Please, tell me what's bothering you" he said softly. "I can't..." she said. "Why not?" he asked confused. "Because I can't. You have to give me room to breath Jonathan" she whispered. "Why do I get the feeling that you're not happy?" he asked. *Because I'm not you idiot!* thought Meryl. "I'm fine just a little stressed out" she said. "Meryl...I will 'wait' as long as you need" he said. Meryl thought her tears would explode right there and then when those words came from his lips. "Jonathan I'm fine...and I don't want to make you wait forever" she said. He chuckled and wrapped his arms around her shoulder and placed a kiss on her cheek. Meryl was glad that the window didn't show her reflection, because that would have given away all the pain that was evident there. "I don't care, I will if I have to" he said. Meryl nodded. "I think we should go back to work" she said as she pushed away from him. "Meryl do you mind explaining to me why you keep pushing me away?" he asked. "Jonathan please just don't push me, you know I'm not comfortable..." she said. "Not comfortable enough to kiss me?" he asked. "I'm sorry!" yelled Meryl. Jonathan's features softened. "Meryl I want to be there for you" he said placing a hand on her cheek.  
  
Meryl turned away from his hand. "Then be there and don't push yourself on me" said Meryl. "I don't want to be selfish Jonathan but I can't have you in my space...I'm not ready to share that space with 'you' yet" she said looking down at the ground. *The truth is there is only one person I can share my life with, but he's not here...no I'm not going to cry* she thought. "Meryl" he said. "Jonathan it's best if we just leave it at that I really need some time to finish the latest report" said Meryl. Jonathan sighed and walked towards the door. "Well, have lunch then" he said walking out. Meryl let her tears out when she heard the door close. "I can't live without him" she whispered. "I can't live this false life" she whispered. Vash stood outside the large building. I'm here* he thought.  
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Vash stood out side the Bernardelli Insurance company, looking up at the large building with half excitement and half doubt. *Maybe this was a mistake* he thought, but his body just walked forward towards the door. He walked inside the women that worked their looked his way some throwing him smiles others, blushing. He chuckled and made his way to the counter that read 'INFORMATION' in big bold letters. "Hello I'm looking for Meryl Stryfe" he said. The man behind the desk looked as if he could careless about who he was looking for but pulled the small microphone towards his mouth. "10th floor, west side, section A room 16 office 23" he said. Vash looked at him for a while before nodding and walking towards the elevator. "Damn she can't work on a floor where it's easy to find?" he asked. After 5 minutes of cheesy elevator music and getting lost on the North and every other direction but the West, he made to the West side section A. He looked around the slightly bust people as they greeted one another and looked pissed, or happy or just neutral hard that their work. *I can see their personalities is perfect for the job* he though as he entered and looked around for a while.   
  
"Can I help you?" asked a woman with blonde hair. Vash turned and smile. "Yeah I was looking for room 16 office 23" he said. "You mean Meryl's office?" she asked. "Yeah" he said. "Are you a client?" asked the woman. "I guess I am" he said. "Wait you can't be a client she didn't have a client since she took on the job to follow around Vash the stamped" she said. "Lately she's been acting strange" said the woman. Vash waited patiently for her to finish and tell him the way. "Oh right, just follow me" she said. Vash nodded and followed after her. They went to some or more like hundreds of turns before the woman stopped. "Claire, have you heard about Bryan?" asked another woman from her desk. Vash wanted to slap his forehead and yell 'can you just show me to Meryl's office!' but of course he couldn't do that. "Excuse me" Vash started. "Oh right, Meryl's' office-" Claire was cut short when she heard a gasp. Claire turned to see Meryl standing with wide eyes mouth open, clutching the folder in her hands. As her lips formed the word "Vash..."  
  
Vash took in the full image of Meryl. At first he couldn't believe his eyes, was his woman standing in front of really the same Meryl that left him 2 years ago. "Meryl" he said. Claire watched the two before two and two added in her head. "Whoa! Your Vash the stamped?" she asked backing away. "Vash..." said Meryl once again as if to check this wasn't a dream. "Meryl...how have you been?" he asked walking forward. Meryl found herself trembling as he neared her. Vash stepped in to her office and Meryl turned and looked after him. "This is a nice office" he said. "Vash is that really you?" she asked in a whispered. "Yeah it's the same old me" he said. Meryl closed the door behind her and stood there for a second to see if she was sane. "You look taller" he said. "I feel the same" she said. "I like your hair" he said looking at her now a little long hair that was in a small lose curls. [AN: People she needed a damn change] "Thanks" she said. Vash walked towards her and placed a hand on her cheek. Meryl's eyes watered. "Your real right?" she asked also putting a hand to his cheek. "As real as it gets" he whispered. Meryl nodded and threw her arms around him drawing him close. Vash sighed as if finally he was aloud to let his breath go free and taken in much needed air.   
  
Claire stood shocked, she was just talking to Vash the Stamped, the 60 billion$$ man. Her eye seemed confused as she stared at the closed door. The look on Meryl's face was...so surprised and skeptical. Claire took it as a bad thing and launched herself for the chief's office. Meryl finally after minutes of eternity but still not enough of holding Vash pulled away and a small smile appeared on her face. "What have you been up to?" she asked. "Nothing much, but missing you" he said. Meryl wiped her tears away. "You look so beautiful" he said pulling on a curl. Meryl let out a small chuckle. "You broom head" she said. Vash got his stupid grin and started to walk around the office. "How come this office is nicer then your other offices when you were traveling with me?" he asked. "Well, you idiot, for one we were TRAVELING and I had other things to do then decorate my office" she said going behind the desk and sitting down once more. Vash sat on one of the chair in front of her desk. "How is Milly, Wolfwood, and your brother?" She asked. "Milly and Wolfwood are fine, and Knives is, well he's under treatment" said Vash. "I feel bad for him, but I can understand where he was coming from" she said. "Huh?" asked Vash. Meryl looked towards the window. "People are afraid of the unknown, afraid of people that are different, because they have no other explanation for them, so chose to hate it, some try to see the good, and others just don't care. Most of the time the hate is great for they are full of fear" said Meryl.   
  
Vash chuckled "For a minuet how smart you are" he said. Meryl smile. "It's nice to see you again...even though you look the same" she whispered. Vash looked down as an awkward silence worked it's way in to the room. Meryl stared at the man before him, he had grown so much more handsome, but that could be the time she didn't seem him. The sad part was he didn't look like she aged a bit. While she herself became 25 years old he stayed a 27 year old man for the past 100 years. Funny how she fast time went for her, but when she wasn't with him time slowed down for her. When she was with him, it was as if time was running a marathon, not giving her the forever she needed. "Why?" she asked finally. "Why what?" she asked. "Why did you come?" she asked. *Smart Meryl your so smart! Your pushing the man you love away from you!* she thought. Vash knew that she wanted to know, but he also had doubts about if she didn't want him there. "I wanted see how you were doing considering I had nothing to do" he said. "Oh" was all that came out of Meryl. Another silence fell in the room that seem so still yet it was vibrating. The small knock on the door snapped each back to reality. "Come in" said Meryl. The chief stepped in looking worried. "Jon-chief?" asked Meryl catching herself. Vash looked back to see the man who wanted to take Meryl from him...forever.   
  
"Meryl" he said. Vash felt different emotion at the way he called her name. "Is there something you wanted to tell me?" she asked. "There is a little mix up I'm sure, but is that Vash the Stamped?" he asked. "Yes, sir it is Vash the Stamped" she said. The chief looked at the way her eyes softened. Vash turned and threw the chief his stupid grin and waved. Meryl chuckled with a small smile. The chief seemed so disturbed by this act that he just stared dumbly. "Jonathan everything is all right" said Meryl. Vash's smile disappeared slowly when he heard her address him by his first name. Chief nodded and walked out. "I think I should go" said Vash standing up to leave. "Where are you staying?" she asked. Vash laughed nervously "Well I didn't think of that I came straight here" he said. "You can stay at my place, there is plenty of room there" she said looking at the ground. Vash chuckled "Are sure there is enough room for me?" he asked. "There always be room for you...no matter what" she said. Vash turned and pulled Meryl in to another hug. "I wanted to see if your all right" he said. "I am" she said. *NO YOUR NOT!* they both thought. "I'll show you to my place" she said. "Don't you have to work?" he asked. Meryl shook her head on his chest. "No, I finish everything I need to" she whispered. Vash nodded and let her go so she could grab her bag and other things.  
  
Meryl and Vash stepped out of her office as everyone eyed him. "Meryl where are you going?" asked Claire. "I'm taking the rest of the day off" said Meryl. "You...You are?" she asked surprised. Meryl smiled and walked out with Vash. "I think the world has finally gone insane, Meryl Stryfe just left work before the rest of us, and were alive after Vash the Stamped has stepped in to this building" said Bryan as he passed the wide eyed women. Chief looked out the window and watched as Meryl and the Humanoid Typhoon walked out smiling at each other. "I don't know why they looked so surprised" said Meryl as he and Vash walked in to the small crowd. "Hey how about we get some doughnuts" said Vash pointing at the bakery. "Sure" said Meryl. They walked in to the small bakery with some small French style tables. "What will you like?" asked a waiter. "A cup of tea and dozen doughnut" said Meryl. The waiter nodded and walked off. "This is a cute place" said Vash looking around. "Yeah, I come here sometimes. great place to think" she said. Vash looked towards Meryl where she sat with a soft smile. "You didn't have to leave you know" he said. "I know, but I was tired of the same room" she said. Those words to Vash was like saying 'I'm your take me' for Meryl never picks anything over her job. The waiter came back shortly with a cup of tea and a tray full of doughnuts. Meryl's eyes sparkled at the way Vash stuffed his mouth. Yeah it would have been a turn off if hey were back in the old times, but when you don't see the man you love for 2 damn years you accept any part of him.  
  
Vash watched as Meryl sat there smiling at him. She lips moved toward the cup of tea in her hands. He couldn't take his eyes from her face, she looked so beautiful with the steam surrounding her face, her lips that glisten with the moisture of the liquid. He had to smile, she seem happy, and he didn't know if it was because of him or just that she was feeling that way today. They sat no words expressed each enjoying the others company. "These doughnuts are good, do you want some?" he asked. "No, I'm fine" she said. She wanted to laugh, it seemed 'I'm Fine' has become part of her everyday vocabulary, and phrase. Vash smiled and nodded. They spent most of the morning just in the bakery watching each other to their hearts content, and still it wasn't enough. Around noon they thought they should take a walk. Meryl showed him some of the places she spent her time, which consisted of a book store, a small restaurant, and a boutique. "I want you to see the park" she said pulling him by his hand. Vash smiled and held her hand. They walked hand in hand in to the small part of the city that managed to grow up some geo plant. It was beautiful, the green trees that surrounded the small area as if they were keeping a secret that the rest of the world wasn't supposed to know. The suns light shining like large jewels under the lush green leaves.   
  
"This is my favorite spot" said Meryl. There was some small birds that cheeped and flew by, they neared the fountain that had the running clear water. Vash smiled, the place felt alive, and warm. "It's a beautiful place" he said. "I know, I come here all the time" she said. "Do you come alone?" he asked. "I never bought anyone here, except you" she said. Vash pulled her close, lacing their fingers together. Meryl looked up at him and found her breath catch in her throat, as Vash smiled up at her, he looked like an angel with the sun light and leaves playing on his face. "I only want to bring you here...to share this with you" she whispered. Vash nodded and looked down at face. He leaned down to taste her, to feel her lips between his, but before they could a ball came flying towards them. Vash caught the ball with one hand looked at it. "Hey Mister can we have our ball back?" asked a small boy looking up at him wrinkling his nose. Meryl smiled and took the ball from Vash and handed to the boy. "Here you go" she said. "Hey thanks" he said and ran off to where his other friends were. Meryl looked toward the fountain and started to walk towards it. In truth she was nervous, and afraid when Vash was about to kiss, so naturally she was grateful to the small boy.   
  
Vash followed after her with a small smile. He watched as Meryl dipped her hand in to the water and let the substance flow through her hand and then she repeated it again. "Funny how two years feel like living life all over again" said Meryl. "For me it was like living 133 year of my life again" said Vash. "The chief..." started Meryl. "I know..." said Vash. Meryl looked at where Vash stood. "How?" she asked. "Milly gave the letter you wrote to her" he said. "I should have known" whispered Meryl. "Do you love him?" asked Vash. "What kind of question is that?" she asked. "The kind of question where you tell me yes or no and explain your reason" he said. "How could you think? Did you read that letter or did Milly just read you certain parts?" she asked. "I read it...I read it all" he said. "So then how can you ask me such a stupid and painful question?" she asked. "How?" he asked. "No...Vash I don't love him" she said. "Then why can't you tell him 'no' because I can tell he loves you" said Vash. "I don't know Vash" she said. "Your thinking about it...aren't you?" asked Vash. "Can you blame me?" she asked. "No, I guess not" he said. "No matter it wouldn't last" said Meryl. "Huh?" asked Vash. "The marriage...because I wouldn't know how to control myself" she said. Vash thought she lost her mind. "Funny isn't it Vash, how I try so hard to keep myself in control, while my biggest fear is that I'll lose control" she said. "Meryl..." he started.  
  
"Don't Vash...lets not start it again" she said standing. "Come on I'll show you to my apartment, it's through the park" she said. Vash frowned and followed. They walked the short distance in silent. Each trying and hoping that a whole on the ground would just swallow them up. They neared a small apartment building going up to about 8 floors. "I live there, because you can at least see some green when you look out the window" she said as she pushed open the door and walked inside. They got on to the elevator, another 2 minuets of cheesy music, and then they were on the 6th floor. "This is my apartment" she said as she unlocked the door and it opened to a cream colored wall of the hall way, the walls held painting and picture frames the ceiling had a small simple yet elegant lighting system. Vash stepped in and Meryl after him closing the door. Vash walked forward and entered a fairly large room which had walls of an ivory color with white roses as border, the room was full with beautiful creamy white sofa, a 'love' seat right next to it, and a chair across from the love seat, in the center of the whole seats was a glass table, which held a patter filled with dried flowers. [AN: potpourri is the dried flower with pretty colors and smells nice] Ivory vintage lace jacquard panels and scarf over them on the big windows that looked in to the small park they had just past. The room contained other items, But all in all it was an orderly and beautiful place just like the owner. "It's a nice place" he said. "Thanks" said Meryl hanging her cape on the hook. Vash looked around, the room was filled with picture of her and Milly, and her, and others that he didn't know.  
  
Those pictures started to bring questions about her past and about her life. Come to think of it he didn't know who Meryl Stryfe was when it all came down to it. He knew her as the insurance girl, and that was all. Meryl watched as he looked around. She smiled. This place was so big in her eyes, just perfect for two people to share, she was here all that was missing was standing in front of her yet she was afraid to grasp it. Meryl shook her head and walked in to the kitchen. She felt silly, and she felt like she was back to the beginning, struggling to tell him that she cared. She looked around and then at the clock which read 3:30. Again time was running a marathon with her time with him. She stood frozen for a minute before she started to take some items out to make Vash dinner. Vash finally noticed that Meryl wasn't in the room with him, and heard noise coming from the what he assume was the kitchen. He walked in to the kitchen to see her busy with cutting up something and humming to herself as she did. Vash would have laughed if he wasn't in love with this woman, she was perfect in situation you threw at her. A house wife, a mother, an insurance girl, a body guard, anything. But the horrible truth was she just couldn't be Meryl.  
  
TBC  
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AN: Ok *Yawn* I am tired as hell. I finish this chapter for all of you. I wanted to make it longer but didn't have the time or energy. I will put up another chapter hopefully tomorrow, until then please review. I love all of you who did. Sorry for my crappy spelling and grammar T_T but I can't help it. Thanks ^_~ 


	5. The path that is both right and wrong Ch...

The Black Rose of Gunsmoke  
By: Haruka-chan  
  
AN: Hello! *Yes I am embarrassed by my 'sweet' side more like retarded* Well anyway I am a new fan of Trigun, so I don't know ALL the information about it, but I'm on the quest of uncovering everything I can! AaAahah *See what I mean?* This Fic is going to different from most of the Vash returns with Knives and Meryl being bitch about it, and Wolfwood is alive *She had to do it for her cheery friend Milly* In this story everything is going to be quite the opposite. This fic is going to be confusing, boring at times, and weird so read on your own discretion. I won't explain what it's about, I'll let you find out on your own. Ok let sing the Hamtaro song lalalalala *Excuse me while I go and slap my sweet Cough(retarded)Cough self*  
  
*....*- Means that it's character thoughts.   
*~....~*- Character is thinking about what someone said in the past.   
"...."- Means characters are talking.   
****.....****- Means dreams of the character.   
~~~***...***~~~- Means letters and notes from characters  
  
The path that is both right and wrong...Chapter 5  
  
Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it?  
  
Last Time...  
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"Don't Vash...lets not start it again" she said standing. "Come on I'll show you to my apartment, it's through the park" she said. Vash frowned and followed. They walked the short distance in silent. Each trying and hoping that a whole on the ground would just swallow them up. They neared a small apartment building going up to about 8 floors. "I live there, because you can at least see some green when you look out the window" she said as she pushed open the door and walked inside. They got on to the elevator, another 2 minuets of cheesy music, and then they were on the 6th floor. "This is my apartment" she said as she unlocked the door and it opened to a cream colored wall of the hall way, the walls held painting and picture frames the ceiling had a small simple yet elegant lighting system. Vash stepped in and Meryl after him closing the door. Vash walked forward and entered a fairly large room which had walls of an ivory color with white roses as border, the room was full with beautiful creamy white sofa, a 'love' seat right next to it, and a chair across from the love seat, in the center of the whole seats was a glass table, which held a patter filled with dried flowers. [AN: potpourri is the dried flower with pretty colors and smells nice] Ivory vintage lace jacquard panels and scarf over them on the big windows that looked in to the small park they had just past. The room contained other items, But all in all it was an orderly and beautiful place just like the owner. "It's a nice place" he said. "Thanks" said Meryl hanging her cape on the hook. Vash looked around, the room was filled with picture of her and Milly, and her, and others that he didn't know.  
  
Those pictures started to bring questions about her past and about her life. Come to think of it he didn't know who Meryl Stryfe was when it all came down to it. He knew her as the insurance girl, and that was all. Meryl watched as he looked around. She smiled. This place was so big in her eyes, just perfect for two people to share, she was here all that was missing was standing in front of her yet she was afraid to grasp it. Meryl shook her head and walked in to the kitchen. She felt silly, and she felt like she was back to the beginning, struggling to tell him that she cared. She looked around and then at the clock which read 3:30. Again time was running a marathon with her time with him. She stood frozen for a minute before she started to take some items out to make Vash dinner. Vash finally noticed that Meryl wasn't in the room with him, and heard noise coming from the what he assume was the kitchen. He walked in to the kitchen to see her busy with cutting up something and humming to herself as she did. Vash would have laughed if he wasn't in love with this woman, she was perfect in situation you threw at her. A house wife, a mother, an insurance girl, a body guard, anything. But the horrible truth was she just couldn't be Meryl.  
*********************************************************************************************************  
  
Meryl turned and saw Vash standing behind her. She let lose a small smile. "I was just starting on dinner" she informed him. Vash nodded as he looked around the kitchen that was neat and clean like the rest of the place. "This is very nice place you have" he said again as if he didn't know what else to say. "You should go and wash up" said Meryl. "Yeah" said Vash. "The bathroom-" before Meryl could finish. Vash shook his head. "Can you just show me, I had enough directions for one day" he said remembering the man at the INFORMATION desk. Meryl giggled and took his hand as if he was a child and lead him throw the hall and in to one of the doors that was there. She opened the door to a blue colored walls, with the usual things in the bathroom only this was 'pretty' and clean. "There. Was that so hard?" she asked. Vash pouted "I don't appreciate you making fun of me" he said, Meryl smiled and nodded. "I'm sorry what will make up for it?" she asked. "How about joining me for a shower" he said. Meryl stared at his eyes for a moment before she smiled. "Nice try" she said and walked back towards the kitchen. Vash smiled and walked in to the bathroom.   
  
Meryl walked in to the kitchen and started to work on the dinner once more. She blushed at the thought, but then all went black, as if every time she lit the candle reality would blow it away. Meryl stopped for a second and stood there staring at the wall. Was she really happy? The short time she spent with him today was the best in two years, yet she still had doubts. The door bell ringing snapped Meryl out of her thought. She walked towards the door. "Who is it she called" as she opened the door. "It's me" said the deep voice of the chief. "Jonathan?" She asked. "I wanted to know if you were all right" he said. "I'm fine why wouldn't I be?" she asked already knowing the reason. "You left so early..." he said. "Oh" was all she could say. The day was filled with awkward silences for Meryl. "Hey Meryl do you have an extra towel for my head?" he asked. Meryl turned towards the direction of the bathroom. "Yeah, hold on" she yelled back. "Why don't you come in" she said. The chief nodded and walked in closing the door behind him. Meryl pulled out a towel from the closet and walked towards the bathroom. The chief heard a small yelp, and laughter afterwards. "You broom headed idiot!" yelled Meryl as she walked in to the living room with a small blush and a smile. "Something smells nice" said Jonathan. "Yeah, I just started on dinner" said Meryl. "Oh, I didn't know you could cook" he said. "I don't do it much but...would you like to stay for dinner?" she asked.  
  
*She treats me like a guest, she doesn't treat me like the man that wants to spend the rest of his life with her* he thought. "Jonathan about this morning..." started Meryl. "No, you were right I was pushing you...I shouldn't have" he said. "No...I shouldn't have said what I said" she whispered. The chief smiled at her "I always thought of you as wonder woman Meryl, you could do anything...and everything a man could do, and still be a woman" he said. "Jonathan" she said again. "I would love to stay for dinner, but I promised my niece that I would take her and her friends to some fun park" he said getting up. "Sorry about lunch" said Meryl. "Don't worry, we can go some other time" he said. Meryl nodded. He walked out the door thinking how happy she was at that very moment, but it wasn't him that brought it out. Meryl looked down at her hand, she knew she was being selfish but she was so lost. Vash who had been listing to the whole conversation knew exactly how she felt, and that brought both pain, and doubt in to his head. He watched as she set the small table for two. Her body there, but her mind somewhere else. She let out a small sigh as she stopped for a moment to look down at the items in her hand. "Need any help?" asked Vash. "Huh? Oh I'm almost done" she said. "You know you don't have to do everything by yourself" he whispered. "Don't I?" she asked.   
  
Vash sat and watched as she at everything down, he knew she was a great cook, the smell and the look told it all. "This looks great" he said as he took spoon full. Meryl sat across from him, a small smile at her lips as her eyes watched him. Vash stopped to look at her. "Aren't you going to eat?" he asked. "I will, I just want to watch you" she said. Vash smiled and then his eyes gave off the goofy smile. "Now, Now I feel self conscious" he said. Meryl growled and started on her own food. The rest of the meal went like that, after half hour of devouring everything, Vash sat and watched as Meryl took all the dishes in to the kitchen. Her hands reached for the desert plate when Vash chuckled. "What?" she asked. "I forgot how good you cooked" he said. Meryl found herself tremble as if she was a China about to fall from a shelf and break. "Meryl..." Vash said as he watched her. "Don't..." she whispered as she pulled her hands to her side. Vash stood and was about to hold her when she backed away. "Meryl?" he asked. "Don't stand there and smile at me...I can't take it" she whispered as she backed up against a wall. Vash walked towards her. "Meryl..." he whispered. "Your breaking me in Vash, I'm letting myself hope" she said. "Is it so bad to hope?" he asked placing his hand to her cheek. "It is if your Meryl Stryfe" she said.  
  
Vash wiped the tears that stained her face. "Meryl I'm here" he said. "Your here now, but what about later?" she asked pulling him close. "I need you all the time Vash, I'm weak" she said. "No, your not Meryl" he said. "No, I am and I'm selfish" she said. "Meryl" he whispered. "All day all I could think of was how I wanted to just hold you and kiss you, how handsome your smile was, if you keep it up...I'll lose control" she said. "And what if you do lose control, will it be that bad" he ask stroking her hair. Now centimeters away from his lips. "Yes," she said, before Vash closed the space between them. Meryl wrapped her hand around his neck pulling him as close as it gets, tasting him, feeling his touch...  
  
TBC  
*****************************************************************  
AN: Aahahaha! Don't you just hate it? anyways I know this chapter was short but the next one will be long, I will bring everyone back no worries. Knives plays a big part along with the chief. That's all you get for now. I'm gonna start working on the next chapter tomorrow considering I have been neglecting my other fic for this one. I love all of you who reviewed man you guys make me feel good! Thank you! Please review and I'll love you even more. ^_~ 


	6. Learning each other, a little more feeli...

The Black Rose of Gunsmoke  
  
By: Haruka-chan  
  
AN: Hello! *Yes I am embarrassed by my 'sweet' side more like retarded* Well anyway I am a new fan of Trigun, so I don't know ALL the information about it, but I'm on the quest of uncovering everything I can! AaAahah *See what I mean?* This Fic is going to different from most of the Vash returns with Knives and Meryl being bitch about it, and Wolfwood is alive *She had to do it for her cheery friend Milly* In this story everything is going to be quite the opposite. This fic is going to be confusing, boring at times, and weird so read on your own discretion. I won't explain what it's about, I'll let you find out on your own. Ok let sing the Hamtaro song lalalalala *Excuse me while I go and slap my sweet Cough(retarded)Cough self*  
  
*....*- Means that it's character thoughts.   
  
*~....~*- Character is thinking about what someone said in the past.   
  
"...."- Means characters are talking.   
  
****.....****- Means dreams of the character.   
  
~~~***...***~~~- Means letters and notes from characters  
  
Learning each other, a little more feeling...Chapter 6  
  
Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it?  
  
Last Time...  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Vash sat and watched as she sat everything down, he knew she was a great cook, the smell and the look told it all. "This looks great" he said as he took spoon full. Meryl sat across from him, a small smile at her lips as her eyes watched him. Vash stopped to look at her. "Aren't you going to eat?" he asked. "I will, I just want to watch you" she said. Vash smiled and then his eyes gave off the goofy smile. "Now, Now I feel self conscious" he said. Meryl growled and started on her own food. The rest of the meal went like that, after half hour of devouring everything, Vash sat and watched as Meryl took all the dishes in to the kitchen. Her hands reached for the desert plate when Vash chuckled. "What?" she asked. "I forgot how good you cooked" he said. Meryl found herself tremble as if she was a China about to fall from a shelf and break. "Meryl..." Vash said as he watched her. "Don't..." she whispered as she pulled her hands to her side. Vash stood and was about to hold her when she backed away. "Meryl?" he asked. "Don't stand there and smile at me...I can't take it" she whispered as she backed up against a wall. Vash walked towards her. "Meryl..." he whispered. "Your breaking me in Vash, I'm letting myself hope" she said. "Is it so bad to hope?" he asked placing his hand to her cheek. "It is if your Meryl Stryfe" she said.  
  
Vash wiped the tears that stained her face. "Meryl I'm here" he said. "Your here now, but what about later?" she asked pulling him close. "I need you all the time Vash, I'm weak" she said. "No, your not Meryl" he said. "No, I am and I'm selfish" she said. "Meryl" he whispered. "All day all I could think of was how I wanted to just hold you and kiss you, how handsome your smile was, if you keep it up...I'll lose control" she said. "And what if you do lose control, will it be that bad" he ask stroking her hair. Now centimeters away from his lips. "Yes," she said, before Vash closed the space between them. Meryl wrapped her hand around his neck pulling him as close as it gets, tasting him, feeling his touch...  
  
**************************************************************************  
  
Vash's brain was cut off by the warm sensation on his lips that muffled whatever he was thinking or about to think. He had just firmly pressed his soft lips against hers to silence her. Her eyes registered shock, then slowly, her eyelids drooped slightly as he gently took her chin in his hand and tilted it so that he could deepen the kiss. She responded with equal passion and fervor, her own brilliant eyes closing from the intense pleasure of having his lips pressed against hers. But all too soon, they had to pull apart to breathe. "Vash..." said a breathless Meryl. "Hmm?" asked Vash as he placed small kisses up and down her neck as he slowly picked her up and moved to her couch. "You smell good" he said before letting his tongue run over the creamy skin of her neck. She felt his lips brush against her ear and smiled a little. This dream would end as they always did. Encouraged by her soft sigh and the lack of signs of rejection, Vash began to gently kiss his way down her jaw line. She shivered a little once, but also clutched him tighter so he took that as a positive sign. "Vash we have to stop..." she whispered even though her hands disobeyed her and roamed around his chest. "Why?" he asked in between open mouth kisses. "Vash..." she whispered.   
  
Vash nibbled gently on her lower lip and she opened her mouth slightly to be rewarded with a soft, tender kiss. "We can't Vash" she whispered. "Why not?" asked Vash running his tongue along her collarbone. "Because...mmm" she could hardly speak from all the overwhelming emotions. "What?" he asked again. Meryl forgot what she wanted to say. He tilted her head up to kiss her again before letting his hands roam her body. Vash placed his hand on the side of her right breast, as his thumb made circular motions. "Vash..." Meryl moaned. "I need you" he whispered. "And I need you" she whispered back. "Then why do you want to stop?" he asked. "Vash there is a lot to talk about...we can't complicate things" said Meryl. Vash placed his on her flushed cheek, before he lowered his head to her neck, kissing and nibbling on her soft flesh. Meryl took a ragged breath as Vash continued to kiss his way up and down her neck. She really couldn't have cared if they ended up having sex there, and God did she want to but the more rational part of her needed to clear things before they moved anywhere, after all she hasn't said 'no' to Jonathan and that technically makes her his fiancé.  
  
With much reluctance Meryl pushed Vash away. "We can't" she whispered. Vash nodded as he sat up and stared at the ceiling. "Meryl explain to me why" he said. Meryl crawled near him and placed her head on his lap, and instantly Vash's hands worked their way in to her hair stroking it gently. "A dream...Vash I...I don't know I just can't take it to the next level yet" she whispered. Vash nodded. "then lets talk Meryl...I don't know anything about you...who are you?" asked Vash. Meryl sat up and looked at him. "I am the only daughter of John Stryfe, my mother Linda Stryfe. I was the only child they had, and my father is a big business man" she started. Vash nodded. "I always grew up taking up after him, organized, thought out plan, and everything that made him John Stryfe" she said as the memories of her younger self came back to her. "What about your mother?" asked Vash. Meryl chuckled "You know Vash, she was so much like Milly, she was so full of life, I think that's why my father loved her, because she gave him a way out of the world just for the time they spent together" said Meryl. Vash smiled. "My mother taught me how to cook, and every other craft that I can do, we use to sit around on rainy days and just talk, but my mother knew I wasn't like her...that I would be just as my father was" said Meryl. Vash pulled her on to his lap and Meryl wrapped her arms around him.   
  
"My childhood was good, I wasn't like the other children" said Meryl. "What do you mean?" asked Vash. "I was always the one that was 'perfect' as they put it, and I guess then it matter to me to show to my father that I was worth something, but it was later did I truly understand that they would have loved me no matter what" said Meryl. Vash kissed her hair. "It was about 6 years ago that I left home...my father wanted my to take on his business and run the Stryfe name, but I wanted to start my own legend, I wanted it to be Meryl's legacy not John Stryfe's" said Meryl as she sighed. "6 years ago I left and never really went back, until a year later my mother passed away..." said Meryl with tears starting to well. "My father asked me to stay and take on once more but I couldn't. I already started my job at the Insurance Company" said Meryl. "So what about your father?" asked. "We haven't spoke since, I do write to the other at the house" said Meryl. "But your father..." started Vash. "He was a stubborn man that wanted to build his empire until he died, and he is finally doing what he dreamed of" said Meryl. "I on the other hand feel as if I betrayed my mother" said Meryl. Vash kissed her hair once more. Meryl leaned back on him. "Then that same year I was to follow you around and then you know the rest" said Meryl. Vash nodded and smiled. She sighed once more. "How is it that I feel so content right now?" she asked. "I don't know but I feel the same way" he whispered. "What should we do for the rest of the time?" asked Meryl. "I don't know" said Vash placing some small kiss on her neck.   
  
"Let's go for a walk" said Meryl. "A walk?" asked Vash. "Mhm, we'll go and sit in the park" said Meryl. "Ok" he said. Meryl got up and smiled. "I'm going to change" she said as she walked in to her room. Vash sat for a while longer taking in everything that he just found out about Meryl. It wasn't nearly enough but he was satisfied with what he had. Vash smiled before he went in to Meryl's room. Meryl who was now in nothing but her underwear was looking through her closet to find something to wear. Vash crept behind her and held her almost naked body against him. "Vash!" she yelped. "Shhh" he said as he rocked her body with his. The slow movement felt nice and warm. Meryl found that her arms were now over her head wrapping themselves around his neck. Vash turned her so she was facing him. He smiled and pulled her up and instantly her legs wrapped around his waist. Their head resting against each other. Meryl smiled, her pink tongue darted out to lick her lips as she stared into his eyes. Slowly, hesitantly almost, she leaned down and touched her lips to his. It was only a fleeting contact, a brush of acquaintance laced with a tempting hint of taste. They held for a few seconds, then she raised her head. Receiving no unpleasant feelings, she lowered her head once more. This time, Vash participated, curling one of his hand around her waist, and other holding her head in place. The kiss seemed to last forever. Tame yet strained. Tender in their pressure, just a rubbing, shaping of lips, awaiting the initiation of more. Shyly, Meryl's tongue licked his upper lip, seeking for more. At the motion, Vash groaned deep and slipped his tongue into her mouth, not thrusting deep but inviting her to taste him.  
  
The shimmering pleasure she felt bolted through her body, zapping the nerves and leaving her boneless. With that feeling, she tentatively accepted the offer and sucked lightly at his tongue. Instantly a shudder ran through his body and the hand at the nape of her neck tightened slightly. Thrilled at this, she repeated the action, this time eliciting a groan from him, a deep sound that reverberated through his chest, sending the vibrations on to her own. Her arms wrapped more tightly around his neck, shifting herself closer. "Vash..." she whispered. Vash looked her with a smirk. "Now that is something I can have a second round of" he whispered. Meryl chuckled and gently gave him a soft peck on the lip. "I still want to take that walk" said Meryl. "Damn is there no way to get your mind out of what you have made up?" asked Vash as he placed some kisses on her neck. Her hands drifted up to his face again, smoothing back the skin. Her hands then traveled up to his hair, pushing back the blonde strands, sinking back down to end at his lips once more. Then idly drifting down his chin, skimming the length of his throat. She looked into his eyes. They seemed to take on a more relaxed appearance but it was strained. Satisfied with that result, she steadied her hands upon his solid shoulders. "Your so beautiful up close" she said. "So are you" he said. Meryl took in the full image and found herself wanting to touch him.  
  
"Should I help you dress?" he asked. "Huh? Nice try broom head" said Meryl as she placed another peck on his lips. "Come on" she said. "What if I don't want to" said Vash tightening his grip around her waist. "Darling that's called rape" said Meryl. Vash sighed and put her down as Meryl looked through her closet. "Why don't you wear this, you'll look good in it" said Vash pulling out a black lace dress that wasn't to fancy to wear it as casual, but elegant enough to wear to a party. Meryl shrugged and took the dress from him and pulled it over her head. Meryl took the brush from her vanity table and brushed her hair. Vash watched her with a smile. Meryl pulled out a pair of black sandals. "Let's go" she said. "Ok" he said as they headed out. In a long time Meryl felt happy, she felt beautiful, she felt like she was a woman. Vash at her side smiling and telling her about Milly and Wolfwood, their lives before. Talking about the old times, sharing things only they knew. The two walked in to the park, the setting sun casting a beautiful orange, red, and gold hue over the trees. "It's beautiful here" said Vash. "I know" said Meryl. They walked towards a white bench and sat down, Vash taking her hand and lacing it with hers. "This feels right" he whispered. "I know it does" she said.  
  
Jonathan walked with his niece and her friends in to the small park. "Hey Uncle Jonathan can we get ice cream?" asked a girl about 12 with brown hair and blue eyes. "yeah sure go on head" said Jonathan. Vash heard the music of the ice cream truck and looked towards Meryl who smiled and nodded. "I'll be right back" he said before jogging off after the ice cream. Meryl sat and stared at the now darkening sky. Jonathan noticed a beautiful woman sitting by herself and decided to say hello. When he neared her, his breath caught at the sight, it was Meryl, 'his' Meryl sitting there looking beautiful as he haven't seen her. "Meryl?" he asked as if to make sure. Meryl looked towards the voice and gave a small smile. "Jonathan back so soon?" she asked. He smiled and came and sat down next to her. "The girls wanted to come back to the park for 'boy hunting' as they put it" said Jonathan. Meryl laughed. Jonathan stared at her with a smile. It was a different Meryl, maybe he was dreaming this up, but the real Meryl hardly laughed. "Are you going out?" he asked looking towards the dress. "Huh? Oh no I just thought I would wear it" said Meryl. "You look beautiful" he said. "Thanks" said Meryl. Vash stood in line with four other little girls, who were whispering and looking at him. He looked up at the sky confused. This went on as he got his ice cream. "Hey mister do you mind coming with me real quick I want my uncle to see you" said one of the girl. "But I didn't do anything. Did I?" he asked. The girls giggled and shook their heads. "No, I just want you to come with me" she said. Vash nodded.   
  
Vash walked back with the girl and saw that they were headed towards where Meryl was sitting with someone. Meryl looked towards where Vash stood and smiled. "Are you coming to work tomorrow?" He asked. "You know what I think I'll take that day off you have been telling me about" said Meryl. Jonathan looked surprised, but nodded. "Uncle Jonathan I want you to meet the cutest guy I found" called his niece. Jonathan looked towards his niece as a bigger surprise appeared on his face. "That's a cute girl friend Vash" said Meryl. Vash smiled and nodded. "Here is your ice cream" he said handing Meryl her cone. Meryl smiled. Jonathan looked towards the two, as his own his heart fell to pieces slowly, but he wasn't going to assume anything and he sure as hell wasn't going to give up the woman he loved without a fight.   
  
TBC  
  
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AN: I didn't just through in a lemon yet, I have to make the storyline clear before I can do that. Anyways this chapter was filled with M/V fluff and I do hope you all will review. I love all of you that did review. Sorry about spelling and grammar cuz mines sucks. Anyways if I get at least 5 reviews I will put up the next chapter. Okies ^_^ 


	7. Rain, thunder, and known confessions Cha...

The Black Rose of Gunsmoke  
  
By: Haruka-chan  
  
AN: Hello! *Yes I am embarrassed by my 'sweet' side more like retarded* Well anyway I am a new fan of Trigun, so I don't know ALL the information about it, but I'm on the quest of uncovering everything I can! AaAahah *See what I mean?* This Fic is going to different from most of the Vash returns with Knives and Meryl being bitch about it, and Wolfwood is alive *She had to do it for her cheery friend Milly* In this story everything is going to be quite the opposite. This fic is going to be confusing, boring at times, and weird so read on your own discretion. I won't explain what it's about, I'll let you find out on your own. Ok let sing the Hamtaro song lalalalala *Excuse me while I go and slap my sweet Cough(retarded)Cough self*  
  
*....*- Means that it's character thoughts.   
  
*~....~*- Character is thinking about what someone said in the past.   
  
"...."- Means characters are talking.   
  
****.....****- Means of the character.   
  
~~~***...***~~~- Means letters and notes from characters  
  
Rain, thunder, and known confessions...Chapter 7  
  
Two people who look so alike....but so different...in their thought and views...yet so much alike...in there wants and needs...confusing isn't it?  
  
Last Time...  
  
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Jonathan walked with his niece and her friends in to the small park. "Hey Uncle Jonathan can we get ice cream?" asked a girl about 12 with brown hair and blue eyes. "yeah sure go on head" said Jonathan. Vash heard the music of the ice cream truck and looked towards Meryl who smiled and nodded. "I'll be right back" he said before jogging off after the ice cream. Meryl sat and stared at the now darkening sky. Jonathan noticed a beautiful woman sitting by herself and decided to say hello. When he neared her, his breath caught at the sight, it was Meryl, 'his' Meryl sitting there looking beautiful as he haven't seen her. "Meryl?" he asked as if to make sure. Meryl looked towards the voice and gave a small smile. "Jonathan back so soon?" she asked. He smiled and came and sat down next to her. "The girls wanted to come back to the park for 'boy hunting' as they put it" said Jonathan. Meryl laughed. Jonathan stared at her with a smile. It was a different Meryl, maybe he was dreaming this up, but the real Meryl hardly laughed. "Are you going out?" he asked looking towards the dress. "Huh? Oh no I just thought I would wear it" said Meryl. "You look beautiful" he said. "Thanks" said Meryl. Vash stood in line with four other little girls, who were whispering and looking at him. He looked up at the sky confused. This went on as he got his ice cream. "Hey mister do you mind coming with me real quick I want my uncle to see you" said one of the girl. "But I didn't do anything. Did I?" he asked. The girls giggled and shook their heads. "No, I just want you to come with me" she said. Vash nodded.   
  
Vash walked back with the girl and saw that they were headed towards where Meryl was sitting with someone. Meryl looked towards where Vash stood and smiled. "Are you coming to work tomorrow?" He asked. "You know what I think I'll take that day off you have been telling me about" said Meryl. Jonathan looked surprised, but nodded. "Uncle Jonathan I want you to meet the cutest guy I found" called his niece. Jonathan looked towards his niece as a bigger surprise appeared on his face. "That's a cute girl friend Vash" said Meryl. Vash smiled and nodded. "Here is your ice cream" he said handing Meryl her cone. Meryl smiled. Jonathan looked towards the two, as his own his heart fell to pieces slowly, but he wasn't going to assume anything and he sure as hell wasn't going to give up the woman he loved without a fight.   
  
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"Hi I'm Vash" said Vash waving a hand. Jonathan nodded. "Uncle Jonathan do you think we could go out?" asked his niece. Meryl laughed as Vash smirked. "I promise I will take care of her" said Vash in a sincere way as if telling Jonathan something. Meryl smiled as the girls giggled. "Um sweetheart I don't think he falls under age range" said Jonathan. "Oh come on Uncle Jonathan" She said pulling on Vash's hand. Meryl joined in. "Come on chief" She said. Jonathan let lose a painful smile. "Call your Mom and ask her" said Jonathan. The girl nodded as she let Vash go and ran of pulling out a mini silver object. Vash started on his ice cream and watched as Meryl happily licked at hers. Jonathan watched the two as they took small glances and smiled at each other. He felt jealous that he wasn't the man that Meryl smiled for, that she cried for, that she released herself for. He sat on the bench next to Meryl as he watched this beautiful Meryl become even more beautiful by the second, but she wasn't changing for him, but the man next to her. Yup Vash the stamped had everything the fame, the danger, the girl. What was there that he didn't have? Maybe it was because he was dangerous that Meryl likes him. Maybe she likes him because she likes adventures. Jonathan was confused and deep in thought when he heard giggling next to him.   
  
"Vash your such an ass!" said Meryl laughing. Vash laughed along now with ice cream on his deep blonde hair. "Hey it was your fault you said there was something on my hair" he said. "That because there was you broom head" she said again. Vash sighed and shook his head. "Come on you have to wash that stuff off before it becomes hard and ruins your hair" said Meryl. Vash nodded. "Well, nice seeing you again Jonathan" said Meryl as she started to walk away. Jonathan sighed and looked up at the sky that was now darkening. "I lost again" he said. Meryl pushed open the door and walked in with Vash. About 6 people where looking at him strangely before they started to laugh. Vash being the sensitive boy he was started cry. "Don't cry, I know they were mean" said Meryl. Vash nodded and walked towards the bathroom. Meryl smiled standing in the middle of her living room. Her stomach tingling as if a thousand butterflies had made their nest in there. Meryl smiled as she went to the kitchen, she took out the tea kettle and started to boiled water for the tea. Vash walked out in to the empty leaving room when he heard small humming from the kitchen. He smiled this felt good, to have Meryl hum and cook, just as Milly use to do for Wolfwood. Vash made his way to the kitchen and found Meryl busy making tea setting up small cakes on the tray.   
  
Her neatness and organization was one of the things he loved about her. He smirked and quietly wrapped his arms around her. Meryl gave a startled gasp. "Vash!" she said. He laughed as he placed a small kiss on her neck. "So that was Jonathan?" asked Vash. Meryl's hands stopped moving and she looked down at the tray filled with cakes and cookies. "Yeah" she said. Vash slowly turned her so she was facing him. "Meryl..." he started. "Vash don't worry about it. Jonathan is a big boy I have to talk to him and set things straight, his mature he could handle it" said Meryl placing a hand on his cheek. Vash nodded, but there was a little part of him that said something different, maybe he was jealous of Jonathan because he was so much like Meryl, they worked together, and they knew each other in different circumstance then that of he did. Vash shook of the feeling, there wasn't anyone who was going to take her away from him now or ever. Meryl took the tray and motioned for him to follow. "We'll sit out" she said as she opened the glass doors, and led him to a small balcony showing off some of the city. He smiled the sun was already almost gone. She sat down in one of the chairs and picked up her tea cup. He watched her small full lips take small sips and then put it down.   
  
"I had some doughnuts left so" she said looking towards the four or five different kinds of doughnuts decorated nicely on a plate. Vash's eyes bugged out as he started to stuff them in his mouth. "Your sick" laughed Meryl. Vash smiled as he stuffed some more in to his mouth. Meryl laughed joy filling her to the brim. When Vash devoured all the doughnut he looked towards Meryl who was laughing like there was no tomorrow. "What?" asked Vash. Meryl shook her head before standing up. "Well, we have to arrange a sleeping place for you" said Meryl. "What do you mean for me?" asked Vash. "Well, where will you sleep?" she asked. Vash stood and came around picked her up, and headed towards her bedroom. "Vash what are you doing?" asked Meryl. Vash just flashed her a grin. Before entering her bedroom. "You see Meryl darling I can't stand to be more then a few feet away from any longer so I was thinking that I would sleep right here with you" he said before fall with her on the bed. Meryl on her back staring up at him. "Vash darling I don't think that would be a good idea, can't have you groping me" said Meryl with a small smile.  
  
"Why not, and you could like me to grope you" he said and closed the gap between them. He kissed her soft mouth forcing down the desire to share with her the sweet pleasure. Kiss was heavy and drugging. She clung to him as his mouth moved on hers. Then he shifted to kiss her throat. Her dress going up to her high thigh, his hands closed over her breast. The desperate urgency in him ignited a respond deep within her. She pushed her hands beneath his shirt and sought the sleek, hard contours of his body. He muttered something unintelligible when she stroked his muscled back and arched herself into his fierce heat. She felt him slide his hand up along the inside of her thigh. "Vash" she whispered. Vash looked down at her. "Maybe we should wait" she whispered. "I can't wait anymore" he said as he placed another kiss on her neck. Meryl closed her eyes and thought it over. "But we'll stop if-" Meryl cut him off and shook her head. "I love you Vash the Stamped and the truth is I can't wait any more either" she whispered. He sucked in his breath with an audible hiss as she titled her pelvis forward and rubbed her belly against his painfully straining erection.  
  
She raised herself on her elbows, brining her lips so close to his, they almost touched. Against his will, his hands slid down to her hips to hold her warm, sweet body close to his. "I have waited for you over 2 years," she said, staring deep into his eyes. "I don't want to wait any longer," she said. He sighed, his hands roaming feverishly up and down her back, her hips, her sides. He was so desperate to touch her, to feel her, to hold her, to make love to her. "Ah, God Meryl. I'm trying to be honorable" Vash said. She bit his earlobe. "Don't turn a gentleman on me now, Vash. Not when I want you to be a degenerate outlaw" said Meryl. "I don't want to hurt or rush you" he said. "Vash I'm not made out of porcelain" she nibbled at his neck, her hands spreading fire as she rubbed her pals over his shoulders, his chest. "To me you are" he said. "I'm a flesh-and-blood woman, and I've spent the last two years waiting for. Aching for you" she said. With a laughing groan, he snagged his hands in her hair, bringing her head back. Her lips were parted with desire, her eyes dark with love. For him. It was still a wonder to him, that she loved him, that she wanted him. Wanted him with wildness that surprised and delighted him, and loved him with an intensity that awed and humbled him. [AN: See Vash has deep feelings!]  
  
"Meryl" he whispered. "I've missed you so much" he covered her mouth with his in a kiss that was meant to be gentle but soon blazed up into something hot, frantic. They clutched at each other, their lips and tongues twining as if they could make themselves one flesh. he lips were soft and sweet, her mouth hot. He thrust his tongue past her teeth, loving the feel of her, the taste of her, the little breathy, erotic noises she made deep in her throat as she strained against him. Reaching down, he cupped her buttocks to lift her hard up against him, and she squirmed, rubbing herself against him, and he grabbed fistfuls of her dress and shoved it up around her waist and pulled down her black lace panties so that he could spread his hands over the naked flesh of her bottom. "Vash," she said with a gasp, her warm breath flowing over his mouth. She lifted one short slim white leg up to curl it around his hips, and he let his hands drift over the bare skin of her thigh, seeking the tender folds at the secret entrance to her body. He touched her, there, and she gasped again and flung her head back, arching against the support of the arms he held braced about her waist. "Oh, if you only knew how I've ached for your touch," she whispered.   
  
Her skin was so soft there. So soft and hot and sensitive. He moved his fingers, exploring, stroking as he bent his head to lay open mouth against the creamy column of her throat. "Tell me, " he said, moving his mouth lower, to where the low cut of her dress opened to reveal the upper curves of her full breast. "tell me what you want," he said. She bracketed his face with her hands. "You. I want you" she said. He raised his head and looked down at her. Her lips were parted, and swollen from his kisses, her eyes wide and dewy with passion, her hair a fountain of night fall. "Ah, Meryl. I love you so much. I've missed you so much. I've wanted so much" he said. He let her legs slide to the bed. She laughed with joy. "Say it again Vash" she said. "I love you" he said. He laughed more, and tears started to fall. She laughed wrapping her arms around his neck. He braced himself above her on one outstretched arm, and for a long moment, they lay still, simply gazing into each other's eyes. Then she grasped his shirt and yanked it free from his waistband. "I want you naked," she said, in a rough, smoky voice that seemed to flow into his blood like fever.  
  
Standing up, he stripped off his shirt, and sent his boots flying, never taking his gaze from where she lay sprawled across the bed before him, watching him, the hem of her dress hiked up wantonly about her hips to reveal her short slim white legs and the faintest hint of a dark triangle. He shoved down his pants and peeled them off, then straightened to stand tall and naked before her. He saw her eyes widen and grinned as he stretched out his hand to tug at her rucked up dress. "You next" he said. Wordlessly, she reached down, her arms crossed, to gather the lace linen in her hand and draw it up slowly, wriggling her hips to free the dress from her weight and expose a flat belly, then her full breast which were slight covered by the lace bra, the rosy-tipps puckered now with arousal. He reached behind her and pulled on the claps of her bra. Another tug, and she lay before him naked and inviting.  
  
"Your beautiful," he said on an awed expulsion of breath as he lowered himself beside her. He let one hand rove over the pale mounds of her breast, then leaned forward, using his tongue to draw a slow circle around a dark nipple before sucking it into his mouth. Her head tipped back and her eyes squeezed shut. Her lips parting in a soft cry of pleasure. He made love to her breast, first one, then the other. he explored her body with his nibbling at her throat, her chin, kissing her eyelids, her breast again, then lower, across her belly and down. He felt her fingers tangle in his hair, her hips bucking up as he moved between her thighs. "I love you," he said, letting his hot breath wash over her wet flesh. "I love you, I love you," he said again and again. She writhed beneath the touch of his tongue and fingers, made small keening sounds of yearning that aroused him almost beyond bearing. Then he felt the tremors start, deep within her. Felt her hands clutch at his shoulders, trying to draw him up to her. "Now," she said, her head lifting off the pillow, her gaze meeting his. "please" she said.  
  
He eased himself up the length of her slim body, trying to be careful, but she rose up to meet him eagerly, her mouth seeking his, clinging to him as if she were starving for him. A powerful animal desire roared through his blood: a primitive, wholly masculine urge to posses her, to join his body to hers and make her his. "Yes," he said, the word a harsh gaps as he felt her open her thighs beneath him, her hand reaching down to guide him. He clenched his buttocks and thrust his hips forward, pressed his hot, hard flesh against her yielding entrance pressed, pressed, until he finally eased himself fully inside her. He groaned and lay still for a moment, feeling his body stretching her, filling her. She was so hot and wet and tight around him, and he loved her so much. He drew himself parkway out of her slowly, the thrust in again, and she arched her back and sighed. "You won't believe how much I wanted you" her breath was warm against his neck, her hands spread against his naked chest. He meant to be gentle, to keep the rhythm easy, but his desire for her roared through him, sucking him out of control. "I'm sorry," he said, bracing himself on his outstretched arms so he could watch her face as he spread in to her, again and again, harder, and harder. "It's been so long, and I've wanted you so much" he said.  
  
She stared up at him, her eyes widen and glazed with passion, her skin damp and flushed, her hands clutching his sweat-slicked upper arms as her wrapped her legs around his hips and drew him in, deeper and deeper, faster and faster. He bent his head, his mouth capturing hers for a long, hot, sucking kiss. Then he felt her nails dig into his shoulders and she flung her head back, her teeth sinking down on her lower lip to keep herself from screaming. He felt the tremors start deep within her again, so powerful and clenching that it pulled him over the brink onto a climax so shattering, he thought for one endless, rapturous moment that he had died and found Eden, and that it was an everlasting ecstasy.  
  
She looked up at him. "You better not leave broom head" she whispered. He looked down at her breathing hard as she was, and smiled. "Never" he said. He made love to her all night long. Sometimes the pace was slow and erotic, at other times fast and passionate. Towards dawn, she fell asleep in his arms. But he still lay awake, prolonging the pleasure of holding her, of watching her face while she slept, of letting his heart fill to the aching point with his love for her. Maybe somewhere deep with in them they both knew with the lives they led this wasn't going to last for the best, but still one memory would be enough. Or would it?  
  
TBC  
  
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AN: I know I didn't update for a while, but here I give you the lemon for the story. I hope you guys enjoyed cuz I wrote this while PMSing. please tell me what you think and please review!!! ^_^ 


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